DAY 9th


oke.
sebenarnya ini blog ini saya buat untuk diri saya sendiri.
buat ngatasin penyakit depresi saya.

serius. saya mengidap depresi ringan-sedang. for now.

I hope.

semua berawal dari saya di nyatakan lulus beasiswa Monbukagakusho.

lho? kok depresi? harusny seneng dong?

karena diri saya udah bersiap untuk gagal karena interviewnya jelek banget. bhs Ingris saya payah, bhs jepang, katrok. penguasaan materi juga 50-50. ngomong udah kyk orang nganar, mengulang kata2 yang sama...

saya merasa ga pantas. malu.

ya udah la, ak terima aja gitu..

pas sampe di Jepang tambah ketauan bgt betapa payahnya saya berkomunikasi pk bhs inggris. toefl 550 lbh gak jamin kalian bisa ngomng bhs Inggris cap cip cus.

Setiba di Lab. smw orng ngomong pk bhs jpng. @_@ sy merasa terpencil...

disuruh jikoshokai besokny, aku kira cuma ngomong di depan doang kayk kalo kita perkenalan biasa gitu, lha tau nya student lain pake presentasi ala mau TA gitu bawa laptop berisi PP beserta tema risetnya.

NOBODY TELLING ME ABOUT IT!

rasanya udah mau minggat aja. aku gak buat apa2. Saya mencoba tenang.
untungnya saya urutan terakhir. (saya sendiri yg gak bisa bhs jpng di sana sodara2!)

Jd saya memutuskan membuat presentasi di t4. dadakan. ya jadiny apa adanya lah..

dan anda bisa membayangkan hasilnya? heta kuso.
pasti prof dan yang lain gak ngerti tema yang paparkan apaan..
Eigo mo heta, zemi mo heta!

I got stage fever. done. I'm really done here.



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